Once Upon a Midnight Fishing

One of my favorit pass times is fishing. I like to do it from the comfort of my own feeding zone, tho.
Most days when Mom gives me my brekfest or diner, I drop a few pieces of my food in the water bowl when she's not looking. Then I fish them out and when I git them their all soft and tastee.
It itsn't easy fishing for yor food. It means yor going to git yor paw fur and paw pads wet.
I often stop to cleen my paw once it gets too soggy.
But you have to keep going until you git them all. Or until you git full and don't want them anymore.
Mom doesn't like it when I fish, that's why I have to drop them in secritly. She says I get my dirty little litter paws in the water and make it not cleen.
Whatev, Mom, I like litter water.
Mom took this videeo so she coold show it to me later and tell me I was cought. As you can see, I am battling three food fishies, but I git bored before I can git the last one.


--Meg

Night Mooves / No sleep for the mother

So Mom and Ryan function on a different sleeping/waking schedule than we do. They stop functioning when it's dark outside, whereas we catch our shut-eye during those annoying daylight hours and party down at night.

We're trying to alter Mom's schedule.

Ryan frequently is gone during the sleeping hours, which leaves ample napping space on the bed. Despite this space, however, the most comfortable spot is on Mom's legs. Meg and I like to take baths, nap and wrestle eachother on Mom's legs.
Our goal of course is to keep Mom from sleeping so she'll play with us.

Ive gotten inta a fewd wit the beddroom door jam. We battle every moorning round 6 or 7 when Mom's still sleeping. I kick it and grab it and make a rukkus. Mom usually throws a stoofed aminal at me. She missed me the other day, tho.

When the sun starts coming up we really hungry. I try to tell Mom it's breakfast time. I get on the bed by her face and say, "Hey. I'm hungry." Then I sit on the bedside table and watch her. Anytime she seems to be awake I remind her.

Sumtimes in the night and erly morning, I check to see if Mom is really in sleepybye. I creep up to her face just to check. She always is, tho. She tries to pet me like I want lovin' and I'm like backoff. Sumtimes when I'm hungee I go to her face and tickle her with my wiskers.

--Jazpurr and Meg

Family Fun

So Mom abandoned us Sunday to go to her family holiday party. We were originally planning to attend so we could meet our cousin Stanley, who you might remember from such posts as "Stan the Man."

We diddnt go tho cuz Ryan had a hed pain. I wanted to stay to take care of him. My purring power is wicked heeling.

I stayed home to make sure Ryan didn't get into any trouble. I think he was faking the migraine. He's tricked me before.

Allso our grampy gave us a catgrass growee for Winter Solstice. I keep telling Mom to plant it, but she hasnt yet. Im hungee.

Here's a look at the photos we had taken for the holiday card we sent out to peoples and kitties this year. I wasn't too happy about the snow suit, but it was either that or the girly cloak.

--Jazpurr and Meg

String Theory

My Aunt Sarah came to visit me last week from Maine. At first I though, "What's going on!?" then I knew, it was my auntie.

She brought me a present. It's pretty rainbow-sherbet-colored string made of bamboo.

If you don't already know, I'm a bit of a string connoisseur. The thinner the string, the better, I say, but this bamboo string might be my favorite kind so far.

What's the thinnest of stings, you might ask? It's human hair. I find it on the bathroom floor all the time or sometimes I steal it out of the trash can when Mom throws hers away.

Second thinnest is thread, which oftentimes escapes from the hemlines of people's clothes. I find it on the floor and sometimes I accidentally eat it. Mom doesn't like that, she usually takes thread away from me.

Contrariwise, twine can be quite entertaining.

It has a different sort of flow as it glides through the air and into my grasp. It's also good for shredding.

This bamboo sting is most soft, however. Sometimes I just gather it in a pile and rub my face on it. It smells like Aunt Sarah. Maybe one day I will see my cousin Agatha again.

--Jazpurr

I am thankful that...

... Mom did not let the dumpster kitties stay permynently.

The other night Mom came home and before I could even come out to say 'hi' had invited the dumpster kitties in just to hang and piss me off.

Only three of them were there and Mom said they came looking for food, but then insissted on having shellter alsa. Mom said she couldn't shut the door in their "little" faces. Little, puhshaw!

Cheese and Crackers is as big as me and they might not be even full grown. He kept coming in the bedroom and looking at me. The neerve!

I told him what's what, hissy style.

I saw Mom petting Peter Nincompoop, which she said she learned is a girl. Later, Ryan refused to change the name to Petra Nincompoop. Whatevs. Peter is really small and lovey. I was spying on them from around the bedroom doorway, but when Peter got too close I told him what's what, hissy style.

Jean Tom is medium sized. He's cross i'd. Mom said he might be a girl, two.

Mom gave them treats from MY treat jar. Those jerks. Peter put his scent all over the corner by the door. Rubbin' his face all over it. Yick.

The picture is the three that visited. There's another named Cat, but he's a loner. More like loser.

--Meg and Jazpurr

Pictured (from left) are Cheese and Crackers, Peter Nincompoop and Jean Tom. You can tell they're evil by their lazer eyes, which Cheese and Crackers is utilizing here.
I was abel to video tape their movements for future analiziz.

These are a few of my favorite tastees

I'm sure you've noticed by now that I, Jazpurr, am a pretty fit, slender and strong fellow, wheras Mega's a bit of a beef. We thought you might be interested to learn of our favorite foods. We list them here in order.

Jazpurr Higgins:

1. Yogurt, particularly Activia (it keeps me regular). I can hear/smell a yogurt carton being opened from 1.27 miles away.
2. Quisp Milk. It gives you quazy energy.
3. Little Green Men. I find them in the carpet and try to eat them. They usually disappear before reaching my mouth though.
4. Milk. Although I am lactose intolerant and am only permitted a small amount.
5. Tuna. The best things in life come from cans.
6. Cheese
7. Plants
8. Ice Cream. It's like sweet milk.

Megalopoli Conurbation Mussolini:

1. Chocolate
2. Chocolate
3. Chocolate cookies
4. Ice cream, particularly chocolate. I, like Jaz, have a keen sense of smell and can whif out ice cream from 2.73 miles away.
5. Tuna
6. Mega Meal. I'm told this is really called "canned food." Ryan gives them to me when he is home. We always have a good chat about it before he lets me eat, tho.
7. The salt on Mom's skin. Sometimes she lets me lick her hand for a really long time, then she gets mad because I makes a boo boo.
8. Anything hard. I don't actually eat these things, like cell phones, the ring on Mom's finger, pens, but they are good for chewing.
9. Flowers

Happy T-Day

With that most tastee of holidays approaching, I am remynded of a photo shoot I did for Tyson some time ago. Don't I look delishous?

--Meg